When 2 R N Luv....

So, I've been in an overly romantic and loving mood these last few days, and all thanks to a young man that I've been linked to... and believe it or not, it's not the one I wrote about in my last edition of "5 Songs"... I know, I know... I'm fickle... but that's actually not my fault. Keith has some unresolved ex-wife issues, not to mention he's got some extra females he's dealing with other than yours truly. The son of a bitch didn't even come to my birthday party. Said it "slipped his mind". Hmph, musta been otherwise "occupied". Case and point, I'm not playing second fiddle to neither the broad that left him nor the bitches he's fucking with on the side. If it's gonna be about me, then it's ALL about me. That may sound conceited or self centered as hell, but why should I play #2 if he's number #1? Not gonna happen. Been there, done that. Not about to recast that movie with a new leading man. Like I said, it's a new beginning and I'm on some new shit.

So, anyway... let me get off my tangent about THAT nig and tell you about this other young man.

I met him in May of 2004. His name is Hakeem. He was sweet, talkative, cute, funny... I was instantly drawn to him. I was going through whatever with Dick, so he was like a breath of fresh air. He told me he was moving to North Carolina within the week, and he wanted to spend time with me before he left. I'm thinking "Cool." Little did Miss Jessi know within the week meant the next goddamn day. I wasn't exactly devastated, considering I had not even know him 24 whole hours, but I was disappointed. And I could not get him off my mind for weeks.

I had given him my cell phone number. But at the time, I was unemployed and the cell phone got disconnected the day after he left. Shit. I had no way to contact him. He had no way to contact me. There went any hope of any connection...

I was looking for someone to do micro braids for less than both my legs and my first born (or not trying to pay $300 to get my hair done), and my girl Desiree suggested her cousin Khalidah. Khalidah is one of Hakeem's 6 sisters (there are 10 children in all). So I go over to the house, get my hair twisted, and since I'm there like 12 hours, I get to meet 3 more of his sisters and we all get really cool. Maybe 3 weeks later, his sister Amina, Desiree, and I decided we were gonna go have some drinks. When I got to her house to get her, we were sitting around talking and she gets a phone call. It's Hakeem!! They talk for a while and I guess she mentioned I was there, and he asked to speak to me. The connection was made once again. I had a new cell phone, a new job and all that good stuff, so we exchanged numbers. Communication was back on. Just like that, all those butterflies from the night we met came back.

Over the next few months, I talked to him 3 or 4 times a week. Then I got the call I was waiting for... he was on his way home.... and he wanted to see me. To be with me. Unfinished business, he said. He returned in October. From October to February, we were inseparable. Then he started doing ignorant dick shit (refer to the link, provided by my beautiful cousin Safire to find out what dick shit is if you don't know.) and I just couldn't take it. That's how I ended up fucking with Dick again. And we all know that was a HUGE mistake.

Hakeem and I still would talk, but we didn't hook back up until Mid July. Then this past Sunday, he finally got off his dick shit, and admitted to me that he had feelings for me, that he loved me, and he wanted to make it happen...

With that conversation, we made it official. I have a boyfriend. Damn. What do I do now? I haven't had a boyfriend in so long... just a series of "friends"... but I care about this man lots... even though he did get on my LAST nerve with all his craziness last winter... we'll see how it goes...