Monday, May 23



Cleveland Rallies Around Community in Mourning After Sleepover Fire

Date: Sunday, May 22, 2005
By: Monica Lewis, BlackAmericaWeb.com

The entire Cleveland, Ohio community, from the city’s businesses to its residents, has shown an overwhelming outpouring of support for the families and neighborhood left in mourning Saturday after an early-morning house fire killed nine people, including eight children.

According to reports, a sleepover was taking place when the home became engulfed in flames.

An investigation into the cause of the fire is underway, but initial reports indicate that it was an accident that destroyed the 99-year-old home in East Cleveland. While officials work to decide what happened, the Greater Cleveland American Red Cross is providing grief counseling, food and relocation assistance for survivors and residents whose nearby homes were damaged by the fire, agency spokesperson Mary Gygli told BlackAmericaWeb.com Sunday.

The Red Cross is also assisting with funeral arrangements of homeowner Media Carter and four of her six children, 15-year-old Davonte Carter, 13-year-old Moses Williams, 12-year-old Maleeya Williams, and 7-year-old Fakih Jones. Also killed in the blaze were Media Carter’s nephew, Antwone Jackson, 14, Jackson’s cousin Ernest Tate, 13, and family friends Miles Cockfield, 13, and Chawntavia Mitchell, 12.


“This is one of the worst fires Cleveland has ever seen, and everyone is bonding together,” Gygli said, adding that many local businesses have volunteered to lend services and contribute money. “It’s just been a great amount of support.”

Gygli said representatives from her agency arrived at the scene of the fire a few hours after it began at approximately 3 a.m Saturday morning. They remained on the scene throughout the entire day, as did city officials, including Fire Chief Paul Stubbs and Mayor Jane Campbell, who personally extended her condolences to family members of the deceased.

One survivor was treated for minor injuries and another was listed in critical condition at Cleveland’s MetroHealth Medical Center. A spokesperson confirmed that an adult female from the fire was being treated, but declined to give any details. A representative of the city’s coroner’s office said some of the bodies were burned so badly that DNA testing will be needed to positively identify them, although some were identified after fire department officials interviewed family members.

Assistant Fire Chief Tim O’Toole told the Associated Press that the cause of the fire may center on the house’s first floor, which sustained heavy fire damage. All of the bodies were found on the second floor, which was damaged with smoke and soot. With so many people in the home, an emergency plan may have allowed the victim’s time to escape the fire’s deadly wrath, Gygli said.

“The American Red Cross is always touting preparedness at any rate because you never know if you have to leave your home suddenly,” Gygli said. “It’s not something that people like to think about, but it’s good to have more than one plan in case of emergency.”

Investigators aren’t clear whether the home had working fire detectors. But situations like this should make people more aware of such items in their own homes, Gygli said.

“We just always encourage people that you really need to have working smoke alarms with working batteries,” Gygli said, adding that batteries should be changed once or twice a year and checked monthly.

A 13-year-old American Red Cross program, Operation Save-A-Life, is offering low-income and elderly residents of the East Cleveland neighborhood and surrounding areas information on getting smoke alarms, batteries and education on proper installation.

In addition to being prepared, Gygli stressed that, in the event of an emergency, people should be remember to check on their neighbors. Firefighters removed three people from two adjacent homes through second-floor windows, reports said. The neighborhood, which consists of predominantly low-income families, is approximately three miles from downtown Cleveland. Many of the older homes are refurbished, but some have been boarded up.

Much of Carter’s wood-frame home was charred and the roof over the front porch was partially collapsed and every visible window had been shattered. By daybreak, the smell of soot hung in the air as family, friends, and curious neighbors gathered to view the tragic scene.

"The tragedy was so quick, so overwhelming, the only thing they have asked for at this point is please see if you can figure out how this happened,” Mayor Campbell said to the press following the fire, “and offer your prayers.”


This hurt me to no end. 8 children? What the hell? Not only that, but 3 of these children went to school with one of my best friend's children. They knew them. The oldest of the 8 was my friend's oldest daughter's little boyfriend. He had been to a family barbeque just weeks ago and I met him. And she is devestated. And it just amazes me that it takes 9 people to die for the community to finally do something like Operation Save A Life. Is it a 13 year old Program? I've never heard of it. They step up after a tragedy when they should have been doing something in the beginning to prevent such tragic events. Educate people. Drop fire detectors off at thier houses in the mailbox if they're free. Anything. All of those babies did not have to die.

Sunday, May 22

Welcome To The Land Of Broken Dreams
25. I've been in love for real for real 4 times. 1 cheated, 1 pulled a gun on me, 1 vanished into thin air, 1 continuously breaks my heart every time I see him...
(taken from "101 Things About Me" post)

Today was a bad day. I try not to let things like this bother me, and if they do, I try not to bother anyone else with my issues. But right now, I'm in some serious emotional pain. Has someone ever broken your heart and you feel it... physically? Like your feelings are hurt, and you feel that shit in your stomach, your chest... like somebody punched you and knocked the fucking wind out of you? Yeah, that's me right now.

Let me tell you a story...

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

We met November 2000. We worked at a restaurant together in Downtown Cleveland called Houlihan's. Maybe you've heard of it. He, a grill cook. Me, a server. We would have our friendly workplace banter back and forth. Talk about music, weather, whatever other impersonal things you can think of. And that was really that. He gave me a nickname that he actually still calls me to this day. It's Smile, because no matter how crazy things got at the job, I always had a smile on my face. I never yelled at the kitchen when they fucked up an order, I always came at them with a smile and a sweet tone. So, he started calling me Smile. And that was our relationship. A cool ass dude I worked with. Period.

About 2 months later, everyone at the workplace went out for drinks. That was something that we always did, actually, but he never came with us. Until this one particular night. Sitting in a booth at this hole in the wall bar across the street from the restaurant is where it began. The conversation became more personal. The phone number exchange. After that, there were 3 to 4 hour phone conversations about everything under the sun at least twice a day. When I came in to work, I was always greeted with a hug. We found that we love most of the same things, the same movies, the same music. We found that we wanted the same things out of life. We found that we are kindred spirits.

I fell in love with this man before we even shared our first kiss. And it scared the shit out of me.

Though my feelings were growing in a speed faster the light, I kept my composure. I didn't want to scare the man. I didn't want to jeapordize the friendship that I value. I would spend the night at his apartment at least 4 times a week and we would do nothing but listen to music, play video games, and talk. We would lay in the same bed and sleep. Wake up and eat breakfast, go to work or whatever. It was just so cool.

And then it happened. April 26, 2001. I think it's crazy I still remember the date. I had just moved back home, and my mother and I had gotten into an argument earlier that day. I was telling him about it and he's like "You are always welcome at my house if you don't want to go home." Which I knew. So, after work, we went with the crew for drinks, and headed for his house. I followed my normal routine: I got a pair of sweats and a tee shirt from him and headed to the shower. He made us some food and we ate, then went to bed. But something was different. He put his arms around me, and kissed the back of my neck. That was the catalyst of our first sexual encounter. The sexual experience that still is the top of my list.

That's when things got complicated. We knew we wanted to be more than friends, but weren't ready to be. So we decided that we would ride the roller coaster as long as it lasts. Which we did. Until someone happened.

Enter Renisha.

She started working at the restaurant in the early spring of 2001. Cute and 18. Since he and I weren't exclusive, I presume he decided to start seeing her. It lasted about 3 months. I don't know much about it, except hearsay. He never really told me about it, and I never really asked. However, that did shake me up a little. That was when I realized that I was actually ready for a relationship with this man. I was ready to toss all inhibitions and doubts out the window and fall blindly into him. That was when I really knew I loved him and it was the real thing. I knew that my life had changed and he was the reason. My heart was his

But when I came at him with it, he was hesitant. Which was expected. And I accepted it. Maybe I shouldn't have, but I wanted him in my life. In any way, shape, or form. I think that was my mistake. I accepted his terms instead of negotiating.

So time passes. I've met all of the important people in his life. Grandmother, Mom, kids, his older brother and his wife, younger brother, sister, best friends. He's met my family as well. I'm at every family function, every holiday meal. Pictures of he and I are posted in his Grandmother's house. We do everything together, share good and bad times. But, we are still not a couple. Everyone around us thought we were a couple. And he treated me as such. Everything was wonderful... though we did have our ups and downs, like most people do. That is until Valentine's Day 2004...

Enter Charnissa.

Exactly who she is and how they met is still a mystery. I've been told she's been around longer than I have. I honestly don't know... All I know is he and I had gone with some more of his family to celebrate Valentine's Day in Detroit. The weekend went beautifully, until he made a phone call on my phone... and she called back. That's when things started to fall apart. He and I didn't speak behind that for about 4 months. I wrote him a letter one night, 7 pages of ranting and raving. I was hurting, and I wanted him to know that. After that, I got a letter back. He apologized and all of that. We still didn't speak for about 2 more months. And we were back.

Then the bullshit began. There were secrets and quick phone calls. Days without speaking, and days of not seeing him. And me, being the dumb ass that I am, holding on for dear life. Because by now, I'm so emotionally involved, I can't let go. We had planned a trip to the Poconos, which had fallen through, but we still kicked it. And everything was cool.

I decided to back off as much as I could, because this whole situation had begun to wear on my heart. There were other men I would see, but he's had my heart since 1999. He was persistant though. He kept the calls coming. Since his sister-in-law and I are friends, he enlisted her in some of his schemes so he could get to see me. And I was doing well in my efforts to not be around.

New Years Eve 2004... there was a cabaret party. I was invited by his sister-in-law, and I knew he was going to be there. I went though, and he and I had a beautiful time ringing in the new year together. That night, he explained to me how much he cared about me and how he wants me in his life and all that good shit. He had stopped seeing Charnissa in September and decided that he wanted to try us. I ate it up like my mother's macaroni and cheese. And just when things were starting to look up...

Charnissa's pregnant.

Talk about your blow to the gut. He could barely get the words out. He was stuttering so badly. I didn't know how pregnant she was, and I honestly didn't care. He lied to me. And that was the last straw. Again, I cut off communication. I was pissed. I was heartbroken. But I still loved him, and thought we could get past this. I don't know what I was thinking.

Turns out, she had an abortion. Not that that makes it all better. We talked, got a few things out in the open, so we're talking again. We had planned once again this year to go to the Poconos. This time, he still wanted me to go. So I went. All expenses paid, just the way I like it.

But what was supposed to be a Lover's Retreat was anything but. I found myself asking "What the hell am I doing here?" He and I are as far apart as anyone could be. And I don't know what to do.

Do I let go? Do I stay? I've been here too long, I don't know if I can walk away. I don't want to lose my friend. But I might have already done that.

I love him so much. Confusion clouds my judgement.

Forgive me. I needed to vent. Hope I didn't bore you.

J.

Wednesday, May 11



Commentary: A Stray Bullet Wasn’t the Lone Culprit in Neenee Malone’s Death – Apathy Helped Kill Her

Date: Tuesday, May 10, 2005
By: Tonyaa Weathersbee, BlackAmericaWeb.com

Five-year-old Melanise “Neenee” Malone was killed last week – killed while trying, with the rest of her family – to flee the gang violence that has turned her Opa-locka neighborhood into a Florida Fallujah.

And today, I don’t know who I’m angry at most – the police department in this mostly-black city that was supposed to be protecting children like her but didn’t, or the neighbors who unwittingly abetted the gang violence that killed Neenee by accommodating it instead of fighting it.

Things shouldn’t be that way.

During a week that seemed to be brimming with nothing but bad news about black children, Neenee’s mother, Niquila Godbee, decided that she would try to give her children a fighting chance at reaching adulthood – or at least a few nights sleeping in the bed instead of on the floor to avoid being hit by the gang-war gunfire that peppered her neighborhood night after night. So, the Miami Herald reported, Godbee packed Neenee and two other daughters, along with her boyfriend, her sister and her cousin into a van. They were making their getaway to find some bullet-free air when their van was sprayed with bullets.

One of those bullets killed Neenee.

Neenee’s death, like the deaths of most children in crime-ridden communities, is a senseless one, an act committed by people who have, tragically, decided that their power lies in how well they can wield a gun. But when I see how this situation unfolded, I also see how the demons of apathy are killing many of our communities.

Two culprits in Neenee’s death are, to me, the Miami-Dade and the Opa-locka police. According to the Herald, residents in Neenee’s area known as the Triangle had frequently called on the Miami-Dade County police to do something about the gang violence in their neighborhood – violence that had escalated to the point where people were bedding down in hallways and beneath tables to avoid being shot. But the county police often refused to come out, saying that they would be encroaching on the Opa-locka police territory.

But then – get this – the Opa-locka police chief admitted to the Herald that they were too short-staffed to patrol a place like the Triangle. That admission is even backed up in a Florida Department of Law report cited by the Herald; one which said that drug dealers in that area even make deals in front of marked police cars.

So here, we have the county police citing a turf war with the local police as their excuse for doing nothing to protect a black neighborhood. Then we have the local police virtually admitting that they are powerless to do anything – and, on top of that, allowing the county police to use them as their excuse for doing nothing.

Somebody needs to start a huge voter registration drive in the Triangle, because someone needs to be voted out of office here. This is too pathetic.

But just as pathetic is the acquiescence of residents like Nicole Hood. When asked about the violence, she told the Herald that she was, in a way, used to it – and she talked about sleeping on a floor in a back room to escape one particularly dangerous spate of violence.

No one should ever let themselves get used to that sort of thing. But the fact that the residents are giving the criminals that sort of power, or haven’t become angry enough to do something about it says a lot.

At some point, I would hope that their fear of the gangs would be replaced by righteous anger; anger at the fact that their home, a place that is supposed to be a sanctuary, is a place of turmoil. Such anger is usually the stuff behind citizen movements that have, in many places, sent much of the criminal element packing for new stomping grounds.

Of course, I know that community organizing isn’t easy – especially when the gangs have pretty much settled in, and when people have other day-to-day survival issues. But as Neenee’s slaying shows, being safe in one’s home is a survival issue too – and it is up to all the good people in areas like that to figure out how to take back their neighborhoods. If that means voting or protesting sorry elected officials who hand them more excuses than solutions, so be it. If they have to sue somebody, so be it – because it makes no sense for them to live in a place where they have to worry about dying all the time.

No doubt, Neenee’s killing was a tragedy. I just hope that her neighbors are outraged enough to turn that tragedy into a wake-up call.

Tuesday, May 10



Commentary: The Man Shortage for Sisters is All Too Real – And It's Killing Our Communities
Date: Monday, May 09, 2005
By: David Person, BlackAmericaWeb.com

All these years, sisters have been right. There really is a man shortage.

I knew something was up, just judging by the shortage of brothers in the pews at church. But I thought it had more to do with our preferences for sleeping in or watching the game.

Based on the 2000 Census, though, we brothers really are outnumbered by black women, inside and outside of church. And it has nothing to do with games.

Overall, the census indicates that there are more than 18.1 million black females in the U.S., compared to nearly 16.5 million black males. Specifically among those who are 18 and over, the sisters outnumber us about 12.7 million to 10.9 million.

Some brothers undoubtedly will assume this is their chance to add more names and numbers to their Palm Pilots for late-night booty calls. Truth is, all of us –- the players included –- should probably be a bit more somber and cautious about the population imbalance between black men and black women. Experts are suggesting that the reasons why the sisters outnumber us aren’t anything to cheer about.

According to an article written by Jonathan Tilove and published recently in many of the Newhouse papers, violence, crime and disease are some of the key factors stripping black communities of men. Worse still, the article concluded that the shortage of black men is hitting major cities with high concentrations of black folk particularly hard.

In Philadelphia, for example, black men are outnumbered by black women by 37 percent. That means that for every 100,000 black men in the City of Brotherly Love, there are 137,000 black women. In New York, for every 100,000 black men, there are 136,000 black women.

In Chicago, my hometown, for every 100,000 brothers, there are 132,000 sisters. In Chocolate City -– Washington, D.C. for those of you uninitiated to the funk -– for every 100,000 brothers, there are 129,000.

Yes, brothers, that means there are a whole lot of black women without dates. But before salivating, let’s remember that also means there are probably a lot of black boys without men in their lives to show them how real men behave. That’s a lot of black girls without daddies to teach them what real love is and how a woman is supposed to be treated by her man.

Looking at it like that, merely entering new names and numbers in those BlackBerrys for future hook-ups seems almost trivial.

Brothers, I’m not suggesting that we black men who are single and eligible can’t enjoy the dating life. I’m just saying that we also must do something more: We must see what these numbers tell us about the challenges facing our communities and make some decisions about what we can do to bring a bit more balance to them.

Tilove’s article quotes 2002 Census figures which indicate that while black women outnumber black men by 26 percent, white women only outnumber white men by 8 percent. If we were looking at those kinds of numbers, I’d be one of the first ones telling the players to just play on.

But we’re looking at a crisis that points to serious problems. If we’re not being shot and killed, we’re being locked up. If we’re not being locked up, we’re dying prematurely due to stress or HIV/AIDS or diabetes or heart disease or prostate cancer.

I agree with the experts who argue that it is inherently more stressful being black in the U.S. than it is to be white. But brothers, there are ways to offset the pressures.

Slow down on the super-sized meals with all that red meat and fat and excess sugar. Exercise several times a week. Get enough sleep. Lay off the smokes, and cut back on the brews and shots.

Take time to just go and chill. Cue up some jazz, funk, classical or gospel music in the mp3 player, and take long walks in the evenings or early mornings. Or pop some Miles, Victor Wooten or Jill Scott in the CD player and take a leisurely drive.

Let’s try to live healthy, functional lives. Avoid violence and people who are prone to it. Step away from shady activities that keep us out in the streets and in harm’s way. And by all means, brothers, no high-risk, indiscriminate sex with multiple partners.

For the sake of our communities, our women, our children and our futures, we’ve got to defy these statistics. We must begin surviving and thriving.


I thought this was a good article, so I decided to post it. Feel free to comment.

Wednesday, May 4



Album Review--- Disturbing The Peace Presents Bobby Valentino

Now, I know what your thinking... I know. Another young'n on the scene... probably reminds you of Usher a little bit, huh? Well, I can't believe I'm actually about to say this...

I haven't listed to an Usher song in 8 days.

Why? Because of this CD. His name is Bobby Valentino. He's a 23 year old man born and raised in Atlanta, GA. After graduating from Clark Atlanta University in 2003, he signed to the Ludacris imprint Disturbing Tha Peace/Island Def Jam. He writes and produces. His name is on all songs on the disc. This is his solo effort, though it's not his first taste of the music biz..

Check me out...



Yeah, that was Bobby on the far left, singing with the rest of the group Mista about "Blackberry Molasses" back in 1996 at 14 years old. I love this CD also, but I'm not here to talk about this one...

Back to the lecture at hand...

I know some of you are probably thinking "That's that boy talking about Slow Down, I want to get to know you, but don't turn around cause that pretty round thing looks good to me," and you'd be right. I'll admit, at first, I didn't like that song either. I thought it was a little silly. But a friend of mine bought the CD and let me borrow it... and it's a very, VERY good CD... so i bought it. Don't let the first single keep you from experiencing this young man's talent. I almost did.

The CD is possibly telling you a story. Starting with the first single "Slow Down", the album progresses showing you that Bobby may have the name of an Italian gangster, but is still a hopeless romantic with a big heart... and that heart has been broken.

On "Never Lonely", he talks about meeting a young lady who has been put through hardship and heartbreak, and he wants to take the pain away. On "I'll Forgive You", he speaks of the girl he loves, and recognizing that she hurt him and he wants to try it again, because it's worth it. He sings "...I'll forgive you/ But you really hurt me/ My heart wants to try us again/ I know you're only human/ But you almost destroyed me/ Our love was worth it/ Still I need a little more time"...

My favorite song on the CD (at the moment anyway) is a song called "Love Dream"... not to many people can get away with a falsetto, but he made the transition flawlessly... he's speaking about needing the perfect love in his life... beautiful. And on "One Girl To Love", he says something that I hope the fellas listening take heed to.. "If we keep doing these girls wrong/ Somebody's gonna do us wrong/ It's reality/ If we keep breaking these girls hearts/ Somebody's gonna break our hearts/It's reality"... I hope ya'll hear that, cause it's true...

We of course have the uptempo joints, like "Give Me A Chance" which features Luda himself, "Tell Me", and "Come Touch Me". Those are hot, but the ballads get me.

I give this a A-. Cause it's gotta be something, I haven't listened to Usher in a full week. Holla.

Tuesday, May 3



New Edition would welcome back Brown

Date: Friday, April 29, 2005
By: The Associated Press, APonline

NEW YORK (AP) - Bobby Brown's old group, New Edition, says they would welcome back the troubled singer.

"No matter what, we love that brother," Ricky Bell told AP Radio recently. "I mean, this is for real; this is no politically correct answer or anything like that. The door is open for him."

After forming as a Jackson Five-style R&B group in the early '80s, New Edition's hits included "Candy Girl" and "Cool It Now." Brown left for a solo career in 1986, though New Edition reunited for a short-lived comeback in 1996.

Brown, who married Whitney Houston in 1992, took off with singles such as "Don't Be Cruel." But he progressively became known more for his drug and alcohol arrests.

Bell says that even in his New Edition days, Brown's troubles were evident.

"It wasn't something he was trying to hide," Bell says. "You'd see the mood swings and the change in attitude."

But Bell adds that when Brown wasn't drinking, "We (would) see that he's a sharp individual, a talented individual, a family man."

Brown, 36, will be the subject of a new eight-episode reality TV show, "Being Bobby Brown," that will debut on Bravo June 30.

The show will also feature Houston, who has had problems of her own. In March, the 41-year-old singer checked herself into a rehabilitation center for the second time in a year.



Now, me being the die-hard NE fan that I am, would love to see nothing more than Bobby Brown regrouping with the other 4 men who made their impact on the world in 1984 with "Candy Girl", and the man who added the depth to the "N.E Heartbreak" album. But, not only am I a New Edition Fanatic, I am also a realist.

Did anyone else watch that Behind The Music? Bobby is a fuckin train wreck.

He is an arrogant, self serving asshole who does not :repeat: DOES NOT need to be in a group. Now, if the men of NE think that he needs them to help right the wrongs in his life, then more power to them. I honestly don't think it would be the best of moves, considering the new record label and all... but hey, it's not my career. Then again, maybe Bobby would act like he had some home training this time. Because the Home Again album was phenominal, the tour... a dissappointment to say the least. Yeah, I spent my money on that garbage, and was mad as all hell.



Would be nice to see it work out this time though....